If you Google, "cultural exchange", there are an amazing number of current news articles that come up.  Cultural exchange is important to parents in the United States and the news reflects that interest.  In fact, there is an entire bureau in the State Department titled the Bureau of Educational and Cultural Affairs.

A prevalent reason many families choose an au pair for childcare is the cultural exchange.  Even if families first begin to think about an au pair because of the flexibility and affordability, they are often won over to the program because of the cultural influx into their household.  I have started many host family interviews with the question, "How important is cultural exchange to your family".  Often, the parents will look at one another, shrug their shoulders, and say, "Well, it is important".  I can tell they have not given it much thought.  As we progress in our discussion, I tend to give little examples of how an au pair has shared her culture with a current host family.

For example, I have a Serbian au pair that cooked Serbian food for her host family for a week to celebrate a holiday from her home country that we do not celebrate in the United States.  I have another au pair that makes little toys for her host children out of paper, similar to the toys she played with as a child.  There are many examples of au pairs sharing their culture.

As we continue with the host family interview, the host family realizes how excited they are to have another culture in their house.

Here are some ideas that you or your au pair can do with your children to increase the cultural exchange of having an au pair.

• Toys:  Choose toys and offer activities that reflect a variety of cultural backgrounds
• Language:  Talk about language.  Some languages have more than one word for what English speakers think of as a single entity.  Ask your au pair if there are any examples in her language.
• Body language:  For English speakers, nodding the head signifies "yes".  In some cultures, nodding means "no".  Ask your au pair what body language in her country is different from body language in the U.S.
• Folklore:  Each family has its own folklore, a set of beliefs, myths, tales, and practices.  Ask your au pair about their special holiday games or food from their childhood; whether they know any dances, songs or language from "the old days" and if they know of any special "family rules."  (For instance, one family sets the rule that you can only eat one piece of popcorn at a time out of the bowl.)
• Books:  Read books that feature other cultures.  For a great book lists organized by age groups, visit Kids Activities.
• Watch Foreign Films:  the Oscar Nominations for Foreign Language Films are out and although not appropriate for children, it is interesting as a host parent to see what foreign countries are nominated.  For foreign films that are appropriate for children, PBS has some suggestions.
• Music:  Ask your au pair about the music she or he listened to as a child.  See if you can download any of them for your children.  If not, the Putumayo Kids record label produces upbeat, culturally authentic music including folk, Celtic, reggae, Latin and African music.

When training their au pair, I prefer my host families role model the activities and expectations for their au pair.  Those first 3 training days after au pair arrival should be a time of Show and Tell.  I find that in homes where the family only explains, the au pair might not understand as well as in the homes where she is shown.  If the host family is having a third party train the au pair, the family should make sure the au pair is being trained correctly and check in often to be a part of the training process. 

One helpful suggestion I give during my Host Family Interview is to give the au pair a tour of your home and show her how everything works in detail.  Demonstrate first and then have her show you she understands several times.  Go through the kitchen and explain the microwave, the stove, the refrigerator, and the dishwasher and how you use them in your family.  For example, do you rinse the dishes before loading them in the dishwasher?  You need to tell your au pair your family's system.  In the bathroom explain the working of your toilet and how to plunge it (where the plunger is located) or what to do if the toilet or sink overflows.  Make sure she knows only toilet paper goes in the toilet!!!  The window treatments need to be explained in some homes.  The au pair might not know how to work a set of fancy blinds.  Think of all the ways your home is unique and what is important for a new person to learn.  It may feel obvious and silly to you to explain these things, but this method prevents many misunderstandings and expensive household mistakes.  Your au pair will appreciate the time you take to teach her in the beginning.

It is also a wise idea to explain what your au pair should do in case of a household emergency.  What if she gets locked out of the house?  What if she sets off the security alarm?  What if there is a kitchen fire?  Did you show her where the fire extinguisher was located?  What if the dog runs away?  Does she know where the emergency numbers are posted if one of the kids falls?  What if your aupair is in an automobile accident?  Have you explained the legal procedures for this?  It is important to POST the emergency numbers as well as having the au pair enter them in her cell phone.  Often, it is in a crisis when one can't find something like their phone.  These numbers and names need to be posted in an obvious location for her to see quickly.

Over the years of my being an Area Director, I've had a few toilets overflow and a few metal spoons get microwaved.  One au pair got locked out of her house family's car.  In all of these cases, the family overlooked explaining the workings of the home and the car.  It is simpler to assume your au pair will just know these things.  However, cultural differences come into play here.  Not every girl has access to a microwave or a dishwasher in her country!  It is better to be obvious and spend a few hours on show and tell with your au pair and prevent future emergencies.