February 17, 2012
The need for mommy friends
Posted by Claire Turner
When I had my son 8 years ago, I was not working and as such had time to devote to him and hanging out with other mommies going for walks, coffee, singing groups, baby yoga classes… Ahh what a nice life I had! With my daughter, however, life is very different; living in a more suburban area and with 2 jobs, and as a result, barely enough time to hold down work and juggle basic baby duties, let alone schlepp out to social events. (And yes, in case you were wondering I do need an au pair!)
I did manage lunch with a baby friend this past Friday but I was like a creature starved for fellow mommy chat, so strong is the need for reassurance that you’re doing ok and that your baby is on track: Is Ayla rolling over yet?, sitting up? How often are you breastfeeding now? And what about solids? When and for how long is she napping? And at night? On and on went my interrogations..
So, needless to say, do as I say and not as I do….
Do make time to make mommy friends. Plan play dates and attend mommy and me get-togethers – sure little Owen probably could care less about baby sitting next to him right now, but in time he will, and in the meantime you need the interaction with his mommy, even if it is while singing ‘The Wheels on the Bus’!
Don’t treat the internet as your new best mommy friend! Saying don’t look on the internet is pointless of course, but try not to obsessively look stuff up about baby ailments or hitting milestones - you can totally freak yourself out, believe me I know!
There might be an extra being in your house, one seemingly glued to your hip or breast, but the irony is that looking after baby can be a lonely job. It is easy to lose confidence if you don’t force yourself to get out the house and socialize with other non-dribbling humans, especially the ones that know what you’re going through. So, stop reading blogs for now, load up baby, and head on out for some mommy and me time. I promise I’ll try more too…





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