This weekend a YouTube video was in the news.  The video shows a two year old listening to her Daddy read her a bedtime story.  He is active duty military and deployed while she is growing up every day.  The video is touching as she claps her hands while he reads her a book on the screen. 

The video, showcasing military life, reminded me about one benefit of au pairs that is not mentioned very often.  Because I live in a large military area, I am very aware of this benefit and talk with my families about it.  But, the benefit is not just for military.  All families can benefit.  In today’s corporate world, as well as the military, many families move under the demands of their careers.  For a family in the process of moving, an au pair is invaluable.  Unlike most nannies and any other form of childcare, an au pair can move with your family.  Below are many benefits of having childcare that moves with your family:

• Cohesiveness for your children during a disruptive time

During a move, schools change, houses change, rooms change, friends change.  One thing that does not have to change during a move is their caregiver.  It is reassuring for children to minimize any change possible during a move.

•  "The house is being shown, where do the children go?  The movers are here, what do I do with the children?  We need to unpack, how can I accomplish that?"

With an au pair, these types of questions are easily answered.  The au pair can help the children continue their daily life, minimizing the impact of the moving process in both locations.  Ballet lessons, soccer games, and school work at the library can continue for the children under the guidance of their au pair.

• Easing the transition into a new community

An au pair can help the entire family ease into a new community.  From researching new ballet studios to finding the neighborhood soccer team, an au pair is a valuable asset for host parents while they are at work adjusting to their own new environment.

I love the fall and I love the activities that come with the change of season.  Having in-home childcare gives children the guidance and help to do the fun things found on the internet, the television, or in magazines during this wonderful season.

It is such a great feeling to walk in the door knowing your child has been having fun while you worked.  The reward of a big smile and, "look what I did today" are priceless!

Here are some of my favorite fall rituals.  Ask your au pair to do some with your children this fall.

Caramel Apples

Ingredients

• 1 14-ounce bag individually wrapped caramel candies (about 50)
• 2 tablespoons milk
• 4-6 medium apples
• 4-6 craft sticks

Instructions

• Place the unwrapped caramels in a shallow microwave-safe bowl.
• Mix in the milk and microwave on high for 2 minutes, stirring after 1 minute.  Be careful with this step as the caramel will get hot.
• When the caramels are melted, remove the dish from the microwave with pot holders and stir the sauce until smooth.  Set aside to cool slightly.
• Generously butter a baking sheet.  Twist off the apple stems and spear each fruit with a craft stick.
• Roll one apple in the caramel sauce until it is thoroughly coated.  Place it; stick pointing up, on the baking sheet.
• To thoroughly coat an apple, roll it in the caramel sauce, and then hold it upright so the sauce slides down the sides.
• Working quickly, coat the remaining apples in the caramel sauce.  The caramel coating will be gooey, so refrigerate the apple for 15 minutes or until the caramel is slightly hardened.

Pumpkin Games

Grab some pumpkins at the grocery store and play these games indoors or out.  Have a play date for some friendly competition during the day or do this as a family in the evenings.

Pumpkin bowling:  Set up a triangle of ten vertical containers such as 2 liter soda bottles, empty cans, paper towel rolls, etc.  Roll the pumpkin 3 times to try and get them all down.

Pumpkin rolling:  For medium to large pumpkins, do a pumpkin rolling game.  Set a starting line and a finish line and have your little ones roll the pumpkins from the start to finish. 

Autumn Yard Collage

This is a great activity with children.  Materials needed to create your autumn yard collage include hay bales, pumpkins (all sizes), scarecrows, witches, cornucopias, etc.  Anything related to fall will look wonderful.  Stack the hay bales to create a backdrop.  Next, place a huge scarecrow (or witch) on the center of the stack.  Then add other complimentary fall accessories.  Your children will take pride in their lovely 3 dimensional work of art.

I have talked in previous blog posts about managing relationships between your au pair,  yourselves and your children (and even your pets). Something else that is often overlooked, however, is the relationship between your new au pair and any other household staff you may have, like another childcare provider, specialist tutor, personal assistant, house manager, cleaner, gardener, pool cleaner, or anyone else that may work for you and spend time in and around your house on a regular basis, or even sporadically.

Most obviously, if you have other childcare providers, it is imperative that you are clear with both your new au pair and the original help on who is doing what. Give each person their specific weekly schedule, whether overlapping or not. A sometimes tricky point is whether one is to be ‘in charge’ of the other, but if this is the case it is important that all are clear. I have, on occasion, had au pairs and other household staff come to blows because boundaries weren’t clear. The same goes for house managers, cleaners, personal assistants, etc. Make sure both parties are clear on who does what and if there is a hierarchy! For example, is the cleaner to clean the au pair’s room? Launder her sheets or clothes? Or is this still the responsibility of the au pair?

Make sure you also notify your new au pair of other people coming and going at certain times of the week, month, or one offs, so she knows when to expect them.

One final point while on the subject of people working for you, you may also want to consider whether your au pair may have access to your tax advisor/accountant for advice when filing her taxes in April.

Do you have any stories of issues that have arisen between your au pair and other household staff and how you overcame these? Please share!

An issue that has come up a few times in my 5 years as an AuPairCare Area Director is the issue, not of children, but of pets! While it is obvious that host families will talk to the au pair about the children, maybe not so obvious are conversations about the family pooch or other household critters!

I believe it to be prudent to discuss your pets during the interview stage and beyond to avoid concerns down the line. Even if you don’t currently have a pet but are considering one in the future, you need to make the au pair aware of this possibility. Most importantly, you MUST discuss at interview any animal allergies that an au pair may have, including to what degree and to which animals. Pet allergies in varying forms and severity are very common  (I am one such sufferer unfortunately), and could well be a deal breaker.  Also fundamental is whether an au pair candidate likes or is even afraid of certain animals. If Rover is your third child and Petra has a dog phobia...  hmm, not going to work is it?!  

Other things to discuss include basic information about your pet including age, breed and personality (eg: Are they sociable or not?  A barker or jumper?  (feel free to email pictures or show off your additional household member on Skype as well!).  Let the au pair know where in the house said pet is allowed to be/go, as some are just outside pets whereas others have free range of the house including bedrooms – and on this note,  be sure to discuss whether an au pair would feel comfortable having the animal come into her room (this should be her choice).

Finally,  do remember that chores related to your pets are not part of an au pair’s responsibilities, which are to be strictly childcare related. Having said that, if,  and only if,  your au pair likes animals and is willing to put out the odd bowl of food, take doggie along on the morning walk with baby, or even watch out for them while you are away for the weekend, then that is okay. But, I cannot stress enough that it should by no means be expected, nor should she be made to feel guilty for declining such jobs.

We'd love to hear anything else that comes up at your house, or any stories you have had relating to your au pair and your furry friends!